MAGLOR CHALLENGE
Aug. 8th, 2005 05:08 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
digdigil.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
silwritersguildMAGLOR’S CHALLENGE
TITLE: The Noldolante Made Me Do It
RATING: General
WARNING: None
Maglor: Why didn’t you rescue Maedhros; why did the poor chap have to wait for cousin Fingon to go get him?
Maglor sighed, as old memories came rushing back.
“Long ago”, he replied, “I composed a lament, ‘Noldolante’, which told the story of the Fall of the Noldor, and in that song is explained my role and my guilt.
Forever have I regretted what I have done, and forever shall I be paying for my part in the Kinslaying and the burning of the ships at Losgar.
Let me tell you something: Maitimo took no part in the Ship Burning. He was able to defy ‘Attar’ and step aside, where I could not.
I think that I have shed more tears since I have lived in the Halls, for the Teleri whom we so mercilessly slaughtered, and for our fellow Noldor who perished on the Helcaraxe, than I have for my beloved Maitimo, whom I neglected and left for dead upon the precipice at Thangorodrim.
You see, within the confines of grief over one sin, I committed a greater one; and thus, another burden of guilt must I carry.
I know not why I allow my thoughts to be fogged by this compunction to dwell on my past crimes and misdeeds, to the exclusion of all other thoughts.
The compulsion I feel to write my guilt into songs of lament is all-consuming. I let it cloud my mind so that I will not have to speak the truth of my sins.
But now I have dwelt long in the Halls of Mandos, and so I will tell you this.
While I loved my brother, Maitimo, more than anyone else, and still do, and always shall, admittedly, upon occasion, I have been angered by his superiority. Nay, not his AIR of superiority. He WAS the superior of the two of us; and I was jealous of him.
No matter what you say about my kinder nature, my softer heart, my more reasonable intellect, it all means nothing.
For I tell you this:
In the moment when I heard that he had been captured by Morgoth, and hung by his hand, I felt a crushing blow. That blow was the last straw.
And, in a moment of weakness caused by this final blow, I thought: ‘Let him hang. He will be dead by now’, and I left him, for the belief that we could not forsake our Oath to pursue Morgoth to the ends of the world.
On the march back to our camp, these thoughts ran through my mind:
‘I shall now be the eldest, if he is dead. All of our kinsfolk shall look up to me’.
These thoughts and dreams played out in my mind that night, as I stood and beheld the new vessel of light in the sky above Hithlum. For a wondrous thing had occurred. The moon and the sun were newly created at that time, and they were one more confusion for my mind to think on.
Now you know. It is a difficult thing to explain one’s baser emotions; jealousy, envy, bitterness, cowardice; these all played a part in my betrayal of my brother. I am not worthy of the title of eldest son.
I was not strong enough to stop my father from doing what I knew was wrong, nor was I strong enough to save my brother from his torment.
A better person than I did that; and a stronger person than I stood up to our father. Better deeds are better left for better people than I".
TITLE: The Noldolante Made Me Do It
RATING: General
WARNING: None
Maglor: Why didn’t you rescue Maedhros; why did the poor chap have to wait for cousin Fingon to go get him?
Maglor sighed, as old memories came rushing back.
“Long ago”, he replied, “I composed a lament, ‘Noldolante’, which told the story of the Fall of the Noldor, and in that song is explained my role and my guilt.
Forever have I regretted what I have done, and forever shall I be paying for my part in the Kinslaying and the burning of the ships at Losgar.
Let me tell you something: Maitimo took no part in the Ship Burning. He was able to defy ‘Attar’ and step aside, where I could not.
I think that I have shed more tears since I have lived in the Halls, for the Teleri whom we so mercilessly slaughtered, and for our fellow Noldor who perished on the Helcaraxe, than I have for my beloved Maitimo, whom I neglected and left for dead upon the precipice at Thangorodrim.
You see, within the confines of grief over one sin, I committed a greater one; and thus, another burden of guilt must I carry.
I know not why I allow my thoughts to be fogged by this compunction to dwell on my past crimes and misdeeds, to the exclusion of all other thoughts.
The compulsion I feel to write my guilt into songs of lament is all-consuming. I let it cloud my mind so that I will not have to speak the truth of my sins.
But now I have dwelt long in the Halls of Mandos, and so I will tell you this.
While I loved my brother, Maitimo, more than anyone else, and still do, and always shall, admittedly, upon occasion, I have been angered by his superiority. Nay, not his AIR of superiority. He WAS the superior of the two of us; and I was jealous of him.
No matter what you say about my kinder nature, my softer heart, my more reasonable intellect, it all means nothing.
For I tell you this:
In the moment when I heard that he had been captured by Morgoth, and hung by his hand, I felt a crushing blow. That blow was the last straw.
And, in a moment of weakness caused by this final blow, I thought: ‘Let him hang. He will be dead by now’, and I left him, for the belief that we could not forsake our Oath to pursue Morgoth to the ends of the world.
On the march back to our camp, these thoughts ran through my mind:
‘I shall now be the eldest, if he is dead. All of our kinsfolk shall look up to me’.
These thoughts and dreams played out in my mind that night, as I stood and beheld the new vessel of light in the sky above Hithlum. For a wondrous thing had occurred. The moon and the sun were newly created at that time, and they were one more confusion for my mind to think on.
Now you know. It is a difficult thing to explain one’s baser emotions; jealousy, envy, bitterness, cowardice; these all played a part in my betrayal of my brother. I am not worthy of the title of eldest son.
I was not strong enough to stop my father from doing what I knew was wrong, nor was I strong enough to save my brother from his torment.
A better person than I did that; and a stronger person than I stood up to our father. Better deeds are better left for better people than I".
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2005-08-09 08:18 am (UTC)THE NOLDOLANTE MADE ME DO IT
Date: 2005-08-09 11:16 am (UTC)Re: THE NOLDOLANTE MADE ME DO IT
Date: 2005-08-09 10:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-09 03:31 pm (UTC)I *never* thought any of these things about Maglor, which is why it is so interesting to hear them explained now. Expanded, his rationale and motives could make for a truly compelling longer story, IMHO.
But I am *not* biting on this one. The events in my Middle-earth do not allow it :)
MAGLOR
Date: 2005-08-09 07:21 pm (UTC)Oh, I just wanted to do something a little *different* with poor old Maglor! I reread his parts in the Sil and tried to read stuff into his character. LOL!!!
Re: MAGLOR
Date: 2005-08-10 02:04 pm (UTC)Sorry :) I do not often slip into Internet shorthand, but I had *a lot* of messages yesterday and was typing fast...anyway, "IMHO" stands for "in my humble opinion." And you're quite welcome for the computer help; that's what mods (and friends!) are for :) I'm glad things finally worked for you.
Oh, I just wanted to do something a little *different* with poor old Maglor!
That's cool :) Maglor is often portrayed as the soft, kind of wimpy one, so this is an interesting change and you make it work.
YOUR NEW ICON
Date: 2005-08-09 07:22 pm (UTC)Re: YOUR NEW ICON
Date: 2005-08-10 02:05 pm (UTC)Re: YOUR NEW ICON
Date: 2005-08-10 02:14 pm (UTC)I stole mine from northernsun.com. They make products for progressives--T-shirts, coffee mugs, buttons, etc--and it was simple matter of resizing them and they were ready to use. They have a lot of stuff about peace and religious tolerance and art, and so it's right up my proverbial alley! :D
You know, you can have up to 3 icons for free accounts and 15 for paid accounts? (I just got my paid account and so am going a bit icon-crazy at the moment!)
As for what we're doing in the Feanor cult, I'm not exactly sure...it's all up to Allie :)
no subject
Date: 2005-08-09 07:38 pm (UTC)I have a guy friend who insists that he has no emotion and refuses to even try to understand when someone lets emotion control their actions. And this is incredibly frustrating. So yay for having emotion!!
Anyways, you made it work, even though it's such a different perspective. :)