Young!Feanor Drabble

[martal0712.livejournal.com]

Hey guys,

I recently posted a drabble over at my journal:

http://martal0712.livejournal.com/29178.html

It is about a young Feanor who is still learning his craft. And I think I struggled to capture the voice of a young Noldorin elf. I wanted to him in-character but didn't want it to sound too "high" because he is still more or less the elven equivalent of a teenager.

If anyone has the time and interest, I would really appreciate have a Feanatic look over the drabble for me. Does the language seem out of place anywhere? Are Feanor's actions true to how you think he would act?

Thanks in advance.

Comments

[martal0712.livejournal.com]

Uh, that last comment was by me. Just forgot to sign in.

[rhapsody11.livejournal.com]

LOL, but given the time between the Essecarme and Essecilme... that is at least 10 years. Sure, long for us Edain, but for elves. So when it says: Finwë was sad, for it seemed an unhappy chance that the mother should depart and miss the beginning at least of the childhood days of the son. It can be that Tolkien mentions that. 10 years is nothing for an elf and will pass for them 'quickly'. :) But it wasn't directly after birth that she decided to pass on, there is some time in between so that at least she could name him properly (and very fitting) with his mother-name.