Chapter 24 - LOTJ
Jul. 29th, 2005 10:33 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
digdigil.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
silwritersguildHere is Chapter 24:
Chapter Twenty-Four
THE REUNION
From The Silmarillion: P. 74: "Of the Flight of the Noldor: "--- but Galadriel --- was eager to be gone. No oaths she swore, but the words of Feanor concerning Middle-earth had kindled in her heart, for she yearned to see the wide unguarded lands and to rule there as a realm at her own will."
The carriage bearing Este, Irmo, Galadriel, Lindaril and Frodo arrived at the Halls of Mandos after traveling along the long, lonely road that wound along the southwestern part of the coast. Irmo conveyed the news to Mandos when they would be arriving, and he was awaiting them in his front garden at the main door to the Halls. As he climbed out of the carriage, Frodo remarked again how dark and unnerving the Halls of Mandos were. He was not looking forward to going inside the Halls, but the others had insisted that he accompany them, because he was the one who had the idea of breaking the Silmaril, and Lindaril wished for his company.
Mandos's garden was mainly a grouping of obelisk-shaped rocks. Large rocks and dark stones of granite had been carefully placed around the front garden in such a way as to suggest that stern, imposing sentinels were guarding the doors of the mansion. They were very effective. Frodo could not imagine anyone wanting to walk past these rocks. Some of them were highly polished obelisks, and some were carved into craggy, abstract shapes of eagles, sitting alert, with wings folded at their sides, and keen eyes ever watchful. They seemed to issue a warning:
"Do not enter here, unless you can go without guilt and fear".
In between some of the rocks were flowering vines that wound up around them. These vines bore strange flowers of a deep purple, almost black color, and had eyes of bright white. The eyes followed you as you walked up the pathway to the front doors. They possessed an unearthly aura that was unnerving. They seemed as if they did not belong on Valinor.
Mandos welcomed them in his booming voice.
"Please come in, my guests", he said, and led them inside. Frodo followed the others with some trepidation. He really wished not to be there, but to back home on the Isle of Este, where he would feel safe.
"You will be shown immediately to your rooms", said Mandos. "Some refreshment will be brought for those of you who need to eat, and pallets will be laid out for those who need to sleep". He then led them all down a long corridor to their separate rooms.
Lindaril put a sympathetic arm around Frodo. "Never mind, Frodo", she said. "I know that you are not comfortable here, but after you have some food and rest, I am sure you will feel better. I will stay with you so that you do not feel quite so alone".
Frodo squeezed her hand with gratitude. He was feeling quite apprehensive as they walked down the majestic corridor of the Halls, which had such a forbidding presence. He would never feel comfortable here. It was a place not for the living.
Frodo's room was pleasant enough, however. Mandos had a tray of food brought for him, on which was ale, bread, cheese, and even some pipeweed. Frodo knew that if he ate and drank everything on the tray, and then smoked some pipeweed, he should be able to sleep without too much effort. Lindaril stayed with him, as she had promised, and soon he felt the drowsiness of impending sleep overtake him.
The room was very simple, with white draperies on the windows. They softened the starkness of the grey stone walls. The floor was covered in a soft grey carpet, and the pallet that Frodo was to sleep on was very comfortable. There were chairs and loungers all around the perimeter of the room, and it even had shelves stacked with books. A fireplace was opposite the pallet, which had been set upon a metal frame, and in it, a warm fire crackled in the grate. Many candle sconces adorned the walls, and a small table set with a white cloth held the tray with Frodo's food and drink. He slept well that night while Lindaril kept watch over him.
During the night, Galadriel, alone, sought out Mandos to talk to him about Feanor.
"I do believe", she told him, "that the welfare of Valinor should take precedence over the issue of whether or not Feanor has changed his ways. Despite my feelings in the past, I believe that if he is willing to help us, then he must be permitted to do so. A close watch can be set on him lest he be tempted to exact evenge upon you or me".
They talked at length, and then Mandos told her that he had already decided to resurrect Feanor after the last time they had spoken. While he originally was reluctant and did not fully trust him yet, Mandos felt that Feanor would now be on their side against Morgoth.
Frodo awoke and Lindaril sat with him while he ate some breakfast. She was uncharacteristically quiet, and Frodo was showing more signs of nervousness than he had been the night before.
"I wonder where all of the spirits in this place actually abide?" he asked. Lindaril was silent. He put down his head and walked over to the window to look outside.
Before he could get a good look at anything, the door to Frodo's room opened. Mandos stood in the doorway.
"If you are ready now, please join the rest of us. We will be going down to the Resurrection Chamber".
Frodo and Lindaril joined them, and Mandos then led the group down many dark corridors, which wound around in a downward direction until they arrived at a door, which was marked with strange runes in a script that Frodo did not recognize.
"We have arrived", he added, and he opened the door with a very large key that hung around his neck on an iron chain.
Inside, the room was as dark as a dungeon. Mandos touched the sconces on the wall with a stick of some kind, and the torches held there burst into flame. When the room was lit with an eerie light, Frodo saw that it was ringed with benches. In the middle of the chamber stood a structure that looked somewhat like a birdcage, except that this one was open in the front and had no door or gate. It looked to be made of silver, but quite sturdy.
"Please be seated", Mandos told them. "I will be calling the spirit of Feanor into this room, where he will appear as he was in his old elvish form. You will be able to converse with him, but please give him a few moments of quiet to adjust once he appears. You will not be able to hear me say anything to him, but he and I will be communicating for a few moments before his form takes shape, and then you will be able to see him".
Mandos then shut his eyes and bowed his head. "I will now remove my curse of old, in which I stated that the Noldor's inventions and all of their art and artifacts must be destroyed. We have need now for Feanor's Silmarils, to be used as a bait and trap for Morgoth, the enemy. Though it be a harsh thing for me to rescind the laws the Valar have set in place, this is what I must do".
Frodo gripped Lindaril's hand tightly. Without realizing it, his nails dug into her flesh, and caused her to flinch. He cast her a frightened glance; terror was in his eyes. He did not know what he was about to see, nor did he know what to expect from Feanor, who was an elf of legendary fierceness, and had, in the past, committed terrible acts of sabotage and murder. Frodo looked toward Galadriel for some sign of reassurance, but her face was inscrutable as she stared at the silver cage.
After several minutes had passed, the guests noticed that a fine, black, smoke-like substance had begun to rise from the floor of the cage. It slowly filled the cage before it took shape. Everyone sat in anticipation of what they were going to see next. Gradually, the form in the cage increased in clarity until there stood before them a tall, dark elf.
Feanor was taller than any of the elves that were familiar to Frodo. He was slim, but muscular, and looked very strong. His hair was dark and sleek, long past his shoulders. His countenance was grim and unsmiling. His eyebrows were very dark and almost met in the middle. His eyes were dark and piercing, but in them still shone the light of the stars. He had no facial hair, and his nose was long, his lips thin and set in a firm, straight line. He wore clothing of the military style of long ago, in black and red. His tunic bore many straps and strange buttons, and he wore knee-high black boots of a braided material, molded to fit his feet and legs like gloves.
"Let me introduce to everyone, Feanor of the Noldor, son of Finwe", said Mandos. He walked over to the cage, and supported Feanor as he stepped out into the room. Feanor then bowed low to everyone seated, and they nodded to him. Mandos led him to a seat so that he could rest and better adjust himself to his new surroundings. Feanor sat and leaned his back against the wall, and sighed, his eyes closed. He did not speak.
Everyone stared at him. He had an ancient aura about him, and an imposing, mesmerizing presence. Frodo looked anxiously at Lindaril for her reaction fo seeing one of her own close kin suddenly appearing and sitting before her. Her chest was heaving as if she could not catch her breath. Frodo took her hand and held it firmly. She was trembling, and she glanced at Frodo and breathed deeply. Then she jumped to her feet.
"Feanor!" she cried out. Feanor's eyes flew open and his dark gaze shot directly toward her. She took a few halting steps forward.
"My name is Lindaril. I am your great-granddaughter".
Feanor stood up swiftly, and he and Lindaril stared at each other. Despite his imposing presence, Feanor seemed to soften as Lindaril's gaze met his, with compassion and an earnestness that he had never before seen directed toward him. It was a shock for him to see her in person, even though Mandos had made him aware of her existence.
Lindaril saw the softening in him and tentatively approached him. She was of very tiny size next to Feanor. The top of her head reached only to the middle of his chest, but she embraced him and set her cheek against his bosom. Feanor then raised his arms and embraced her in return. Despite his size, his touch for her was tender.
"You are my only kin", said Lindaril. "My parents and the others, of whom there were only a few, have all passed on. Whether they died in battle, or they wandered into unknown regions of Middle-earth, I have no knowledge. I have lost track of them. some of them may have taken the ship to Valinor, but I have not met any relations here, except now for you".
Feanor said to her in return, "The only thing that was ever most important to me, in my heart, was my family. When my father was murdered by that black, evil devil Morgoth, then revenge took over my thoughts. Revenge for his death and for the theft of my jewels".
"I know that your sone, Maedhros, was my grandfather", said Lindaril. "He tried to live a good life for the most part, but he died a fiery death with one of the Silmarils burnt into his hand. He, and it, were lost to the bowels of the earth, when it opened into a fiery chasm, and all of the lands west of the Ered Luin went down into flames".
Mandos them stepped forward. "Let us leave any more history for a later time. We, of the Valar, feel deep sorrow for the necessary evil that we wrought upon the lands. We had to do so in order to capture Morgoth and rid the world of him".
Chapter Twenty-Four
THE REUNION
From The Silmarillion: P. 74: "Of the Flight of the Noldor: "--- but Galadriel --- was eager to be gone. No oaths she swore, but the words of Feanor concerning Middle-earth had kindled in her heart, for she yearned to see the wide unguarded lands and to rule there as a realm at her own will."
The carriage bearing Este, Irmo, Galadriel, Lindaril and Frodo arrived at the Halls of Mandos after traveling along the long, lonely road that wound along the southwestern part of the coast. Irmo conveyed the news to Mandos when they would be arriving, and he was awaiting them in his front garden at the main door to the Halls. As he climbed out of the carriage, Frodo remarked again how dark and unnerving the Halls of Mandos were. He was not looking forward to going inside the Halls, but the others had insisted that he accompany them, because he was the one who had the idea of breaking the Silmaril, and Lindaril wished for his company.
Mandos's garden was mainly a grouping of obelisk-shaped rocks. Large rocks and dark stones of granite had been carefully placed around the front garden in such a way as to suggest that stern, imposing sentinels were guarding the doors of the mansion. They were very effective. Frodo could not imagine anyone wanting to walk past these rocks. Some of them were highly polished obelisks, and some were carved into craggy, abstract shapes of eagles, sitting alert, with wings folded at their sides, and keen eyes ever watchful. They seemed to issue a warning:
"Do not enter here, unless you can go without guilt and fear".
In between some of the rocks were flowering vines that wound up around them. These vines bore strange flowers of a deep purple, almost black color, and had eyes of bright white. The eyes followed you as you walked up the pathway to the front doors. They possessed an unearthly aura that was unnerving. They seemed as if they did not belong on Valinor.
Mandos welcomed them in his booming voice.
"Please come in, my guests", he said, and led them inside. Frodo followed the others with some trepidation. He really wished not to be there, but to back home on the Isle of Este, where he would feel safe.
"You will be shown immediately to your rooms", said Mandos. "Some refreshment will be brought for those of you who need to eat, and pallets will be laid out for those who need to sleep". He then led them all down a long corridor to their separate rooms.
Lindaril put a sympathetic arm around Frodo. "Never mind, Frodo", she said. "I know that you are not comfortable here, but after you have some food and rest, I am sure you will feel better. I will stay with you so that you do not feel quite so alone".
Frodo squeezed her hand with gratitude. He was feeling quite apprehensive as they walked down the majestic corridor of the Halls, which had such a forbidding presence. He would never feel comfortable here. It was a place not for the living.
Frodo's room was pleasant enough, however. Mandos had a tray of food brought for him, on which was ale, bread, cheese, and even some pipeweed. Frodo knew that if he ate and drank everything on the tray, and then smoked some pipeweed, he should be able to sleep without too much effort. Lindaril stayed with him, as she had promised, and soon he felt the drowsiness of impending sleep overtake him.
The room was very simple, with white draperies on the windows. They softened the starkness of the grey stone walls. The floor was covered in a soft grey carpet, and the pallet that Frodo was to sleep on was very comfortable. There were chairs and loungers all around the perimeter of the room, and it even had shelves stacked with books. A fireplace was opposite the pallet, which had been set upon a metal frame, and in it, a warm fire crackled in the grate. Many candle sconces adorned the walls, and a small table set with a white cloth held the tray with Frodo's food and drink. He slept well that night while Lindaril kept watch over him.
During the night, Galadriel, alone, sought out Mandos to talk to him about Feanor.
"I do believe", she told him, "that the welfare of Valinor should take precedence over the issue of whether or not Feanor has changed his ways. Despite my feelings in the past, I believe that if he is willing to help us, then he must be permitted to do so. A close watch can be set on him lest he be tempted to exact evenge upon you or me".
They talked at length, and then Mandos told her that he had already decided to resurrect Feanor after the last time they had spoken. While he originally was reluctant and did not fully trust him yet, Mandos felt that Feanor would now be on their side against Morgoth.
Frodo awoke and Lindaril sat with him while he ate some breakfast. She was uncharacteristically quiet, and Frodo was showing more signs of nervousness than he had been the night before.
"I wonder where all of the spirits in this place actually abide?" he asked. Lindaril was silent. He put down his head and walked over to the window to look outside.
Before he could get a good look at anything, the door to Frodo's room opened. Mandos stood in the doorway.
"If you are ready now, please join the rest of us. We will be going down to the Resurrection Chamber".
Frodo and Lindaril joined them, and Mandos then led the group down many dark corridors, which wound around in a downward direction until they arrived at a door, which was marked with strange runes in a script that Frodo did not recognize.
"We have arrived", he added, and he opened the door with a very large key that hung around his neck on an iron chain.
Inside, the room was as dark as a dungeon. Mandos touched the sconces on the wall with a stick of some kind, and the torches held there burst into flame. When the room was lit with an eerie light, Frodo saw that it was ringed with benches. In the middle of the chamber stood a structure that looked somewhat like a birdcage, except that this one was open in the front and had no door or gate. It looked to be made of silver, but quite sturdy.
"Please be seated", Mandos told them. "I will be calling the spirit of Feanor into this room, where he will appear as he was in his old elvish form. You will be able to converse with him, but please give him a few moments of quiet to adjust once he appears. You will not be able to hear me say anything to him, but he and I will be communicating for a few moments before his form takes shape, and then you will be able to see him".
Mandos then shut his eyes and bowed his head. "I will now remove my curse of old, in which I stated that the Noldor's inventions and all of their art and artifacts must be destroyed. We have need now for Feanor's Silmarils, to be used as a bait and trap for Morgoth, the enemy. Though it be a harsh thing for me to rescind the laws the Valar have set in place, this is what I must do".
Frodo gripped Lindaril's hand tightly. Without realizing it, his nails dug into her flesh, and caused her to flinch. He cast her a frightened glance; terror was in his eyes. He did not know what he was about to see, nor did he know what to expect from Feanor, who was an elf of legendary fierceness, and had, in the past, committed terrible acts of sabotage and murder. Frodo looked toward Galadriel for some sign of reassurance, but her face was inscrutable as she stared at the silver cage.
After several minutes had passed, the guests noticed that a fine, black, smoke-like substance had begun to rise from the floor of the cage. It slowly filled the cage before it took shape. Everyone sat in anticipation of what they were going to see next. Gradually, the form in the cage increased in clarity until there stood before them a tall, dark elf.
Feanor was taller than any of the elves that were familiar to Frodo. He was slim, but muscular, and looked very strong. His hair was dark and sleek, long past his shoulders. His countenance was grim and unsmiling. His eyebrows were very dark and almost met in the middle. His eyes were dark and piercing, but in them still shone the light of the stars. He had no facial hair, and his nose was long, his lips thin and set in a firm, straight line. He wore clothing of the military style of long ago, in black and red. His tunic bore many straps and strange buttons, and he wore knee-high black boots of a braided material, molded to fit his feet and legs like gloves.
"Let me introduce to everyone, Feanor of the Noldor, son of Finwe", said Mandos. He walked over to the cage, and supported Feanor as he stepped out into the room. Feanor then bowed low to everyone seated, and they nodded to him. Mandos led him to a seat so that he could rest and better adjust himself to his new surroundings. Feanor sat and leaned his back against the wall, and sighed, his eyes closed. He did not speak.
Everyone stared at him. He had an ancient aura about him, and an imposing, mesmerizing presence. Frodo looked anxiously at Lindaril for her reaction fo seeing one of her own close kin suddenly appearing and sitting before her. Her chest was heaving as if she could not catch her breath. Frodo took her hand and held it firmly. She was trembling, and she glanced at Frodo and breathed deeply. Then she jumped to her feet.
"Feanor!" she cried out. Feanor's eyes flew open and his dark gaze shot directly toward her. She took a few halting steps forward.
"My name is Lindaril. I am your great-granddaughter".
Feanor stood up swiftly, and he and Lindaril stared at each other. Despite his imposing presence, Feanor seemed to soften as Lindaril's gaze met his, with compassion and an earnestness that he had never before seen directed toward him. It was a shock for him to see her in person, even though Mandos had made him aware of her existence.
Lindaril saw the softening in him and tentatively approached him. She was of very tiny size next to Feanor. The top of her head reached only to the middle of his chest, but she embraced him and set her cheek against his bosom. Feanor then raised his arms and embraced her in return. Despite his size, his touch for her was tender.
"You are my only kin", said Lindaril. "My parents and the others, of whom there were only a few, have all passed on. Whether they died in battle, or they wandered into unknown regions of Middle-earth, I have no knowledge. I have lost track of them. some of them may have taken the ship to Valinor, but I have not met any relations here, except now for you".
Feanor said to her in return, "The only thing that was ever most important to me, in my heart, was my family. When my father was murdered by that black, evil devil Morgoth, then revenge took over my thoughts. Revenge for his death and for the theft of my jewels".
"I know that your sone, Maedhros, was my grandfather", said Lindaril. "He tried to live a good life for the most part, but he died a fiery death with one of the Silmarils burnt into his hand. He, and it, were lost to the bowels of the earth, when it opened into a fiery chasm, and all of the lands west of the Ered Luin went down into flames".
Mandos them stepped forward. "Let us leave any more history for a later time. We, of the Valar, feel deep sorrow for the necessary evil that we wrought upon the lands. We had to do so in order to capture Morgoth and rid the world of him".
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2005-07-29 03:07 pm (UTC)...
Sorry, I had to pick up Feanor. He just fainted.
So unfair! Tsk tsk tsk. :D
Breaking a Silmaril
Date: 2005-07-29 03:46 pm (UTC)Re: Breaking a Silmaril
Date: 2005-07-29 03:53 pm (UTC)What exactly happened when you tried to copy and paste from Word to LJ? I do it all the time; it usually requires some fiddling to get it formatted perfectly, but I did Scene 4 for my play last night in like a half-hour.
I don't want you up all night typing if we can help it :(
If you want, you can click the Edit Entry button for the entry and copy all of what you wrote. If you email it to me, I'll try to figure out why the LJ cut isn't working.
The bad thing about computer code is that it must be *perfect* or the computer spits it right back out at you. When you Preview, does it give you any errors?
Don't worry, we'll figure this out :)
Good News!
Date: 2005-07-29 03:58 pm (UTC)The LJ cut doesn't show up on the Comments page, which is probably where you were looking. It creates a link only on the regular journal page that sends readers to the Comments page to read more.
If you look at our Recent Entries page, though--there it is! IT WORKED!
::does happy dance::
We still need to figure out about why it won't let you copy and paste from Word to LJ. This is supposed to be fun, not wiling away the day retyping your story :)
It will work. I promise!
Re: Good News!
Date: 2005-07-29 04:08 pm (UTC)Chapter 24
Date: 2005-07-29 04:03 pm (UTC)Re: Chapter 24
Date: 2005-07-29 04:13 pm (UTC)Oh, boo. I was going to tell you to send a friend request to dawnfelagund. (That's me!)
If you ever get it, though.... >:-D <--me being evil
At Long, Long Last! :D
Date: 2005-08-02 01:23 am (UTC)Ummm...erm...I mean, that's an interesting plot point. Right. That's what I meant. ::Dawn Felagund jumps into ice bucket::
Okay, I came up with my usual litany of comments. Wait, you don't know how I work! You haven't been subjected to my
torturenitpickingcomments before. I must say, first off, that I am thoroughly intrigued. It took me a moment to get who Lindaril was and what everyone was doing there, but then, I got into it. Blame coming in at Chapter 24....You write good macabre. Your descriptions are spooky...in a good way!
Okay, I've made you wait long enough :) The comments:
Mandos's garden was mainly a grouping of obelisk-shaped rocks.
Oh, spooky description! I was about to type “describe ‘dark and unnerving’" but then decided I might as well read on before letting out the editor-Nazi…ahem, I mean, that precious little workshop troll with the oh-so-helpful comments ;P
A close watch can be set on him lest he be tempted to exact evenge upon you or me
Oops, I think you meant “revenge!” (Of course, thinking about it now, you retyped this by hand…. ::ducks and hides::
Mandos felt that Feanor would now be on their side against Morgoth.
Eeeeekkkk…I am not entirely sure of the extent of AU in this tale, so ignore me if it is part of the point to have Fëanor allied with Morgoth (or if I am misreading), but Fëanor was the worst enemy of Morgoth. He did, after all, choose exile in order to bring Morgoth death—something even the Valar were not willing to do. Perhaps you meant that Fëanor would agree to the Valar’s means of fighting Morgoth?
"This is a very ancient dwelling", said Mandos, as if he could read Frodo's mind.
Now you are about to discover why I think my dear little sister—and my first test subject…ahem, I mean beta author--sometimes wants to throw books at my head.
“…read Frodo’s mind” sounds a bit cliché to me. I picture Frodo’s mind as a book, being opened by Namo and read line by line :) No, seriously, I think there is probably a better way to say this. “Perceive Frodo’s thoughts,” perhaps? This is bland, but is just an idea….
He was feeling terrified.
Can we get some more details on this? How do we know he is feeling terrified? Perhaps his palms sweat or his heart races…it is much better if we figure out that he is terrified from your imagery of him than for you to tell us that he is terrified.
Feanor was taller than any of the elves that were familiar to Frodo….
Nice description. Mind if I borrow him for a minute (or 100)? ;P
Her chest was heaving as if she could not catch her breath. Frodo took her hand and held it firmly. She was trembling, and she glanced at Frodo and breathed deeply.
This is an excellent example of what I meant before when suggesting a change to “He was feeling terrified.” Nice description :)
If I may make a long-term suggestion for revision, it would be to try some variety in terms of sentence structure. I noticed there was a lot of subject-verb going on. If you try some variety, it is a more interesting read :D
All in all, a nice start to the chapter! I am eager to read on. I am more eager to meet your Feanor better!
Did you want this to be an official workshop piece? In other words, are you willing to dive first into the pool? :D
Re: At Long, Long Last! :D
Date: 2005-08-02 11:10 pm (UTC)Originally, I thought I would post the 3 chapters that feature Feanor, Chs. 24, 27 & 30, or would that be too much? Ch. 27 is rather short - 5 pages on TFF, but Ch. 30 is 20 pgs.
Now, to set your mind at rest: Feanor was NOT on Morgoth's side at all! Feanor is an innocent in this story! Those despicable Valar a**holes are planning to turn Feanor and his new Silmarils over to Morgoth (the Dark Lord demanded it or he will destroy Valinor). Poor baby Feanor doesn't know that they're going to do this. The weasels just told him that they needed his help to make new Silmarils and Mandos told him he'd better recall that !!*$%*!! recipe or else! At first he played coy and said he couldn't remember it. (He doesn't particularly like the Valar - any of them.) Then, after being pestered, threatened, cajoled and stroked, he finally said ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT!! I'll do it!!! That, and the fact that the Valar got the recipe out of Lindaril's familial memory by inducing her to dream!
Hope that helped! I would never be so PERVY as to even SUGGEST that my sweet baby Feanor would EVER ally himself with the dark lord that HE HIMSELF named Morgoth *spits out name*!
OMG I can't believe that I actually wrote "--as if he could read Frodo's mind"!! Yes, please do throw a book at my head! Make it the 2005 Encyclopedia of Baseball (I haven't seen that edition yet, but the 1975 one that I have is, like, 4,000 pages long, so the 2005 ed. should slam my head just nicely, thanks).
Yes, and there are probably better ways to write a lot of what I did. This is why I am raging to get workshopped.
Thank you so, so much.
Re: At Long, Long Last! :D
Date: 2005-08-03 12:01 am (UTC)I missed you online today! I know, you take off *one* day to have a life, and here you're getting berated for it :D
I'm glad that Feanor is not allied with Morgoth! Very, VERY glad! I couldn't imagine *you* writing that. That's like me or Arandil writing that or making Feanor ugly or something.... (Down, fangurl!) I was very skeptical about the whole notion, but I try hard to not criticize the premises of AU because...well, they're AU, but I am relieved to hear that our precious Elf remains untainted.
Don't worry--I don't throw books at people's heads. Sometimes, I think, though, they want to throw them at mine! So keep the Encyclopedia of Baseball close once workshopping starts ;)
I would like to keep workshop pieces five pages or less for now. If people say they don't mind longer, that is fine, but I find that people give better, more thorough comments when they are working with shorter pieces. As the saying goes: Quality, not quantity :) That doesn't mean that we can't do them all, but would it bother you to do them in installments?
It is also generally helpful if you have some questions or points that you would like to discuss during workshops. Such as where you think the story's weaknesses are, or even what you think its strengths are and how you can use them most effectively. Or maybe just a point that you want to discuss, about canon or writing or whatever! But it gives people something concrete to work from.
Let me know, and we'll get things started. ::does excited dance for first workshop::
Re: At Long, Long Last! :D
Date: 2005-08-03 11:52 am (UTC)1) Keep to 5 pages or less. OK, yes, I'll just leave that chapter up for now then. No, it would not bother me to do them in installments.
2) Questions & Points to Discuss: I do have some. Should I tell you now, or wait until we get started? I came up with problems that I had, what I consider the weaknesses, although I do not have a clue what the strengths are. I really don't. I guess there is reluctance to claim a strength and then have everyone laugh because it is really a weakness. Blame it on lack of confidence. But desire to learn more about writing overcomes that lack, so no problem.
3) The discussion with Juno about Mary Sues sounds fascinating. When I wrote this story, I didn't even know what a Mary Sue was, not that that is the point. Even now, I don't think that my character Lindaril is a true Mary Sue because she is not from our world, and while she is an OFC, she has ties to Tolkien's characters. Does creating an OFC automatically make her a Mary Sue, if, in fact, in the author's AU, the character is related to one or more of Tolkien's characters? And, having said this, I do not think that there is anything wrong, conceptually, with Mary Sues if that is the case.
Re: At Long, Long Last! :D
Date: 2005-08-03 12:48 pm (UTC)Well, it's up to you how you want to present them! Some topics are best taken as, "While you're reading, I would like you to notice..." while others are best as, "While you were reading, did you notice...." My personal preference is to have questions/discussion points first, but if you don't want your readers to be biased and looking out for *every* time you do said thing, then I can understand wanting to do them last.
The Mary Sue discussion started with Juno calling me on my statement in my last AMC posting that "Friends don't let friends write Mary Sues." While I meant this as a personal credo and not a blanket statement (I think that everyone should write was makes them happy; if I don't like it, I don't read it), Juno pointed out that in the LotR community, the term has become a venomous and essentially meaningless label that serves to discourage (mostly young) writers.
My take on the definition of "Mary Sue" has always been an impeccably perfect female character, so perfect that the character lacks any depth or potential for empathy from readers. If you haven't noticed, I am a bit of a nut about characterization ;D I love my characters complicated, people that are hard to like but with whom I find myself empathizing anyway.
I can't see your OFC being a Mary Sue, but then, I have only read a half a chapter :D However, I think that most writers with a bit of experience--particularly older writers (and by older, I mean those of us who have survived teenagedom :D)--understand that characters should be multi-dimensional and not Barbie dolls that exemplify our idea of the perfect female.
Anyway, from there, the conversation branched off into many directions...it was an interesting morning, at least! :D
Re: At Long, Long Last! :D
Date: 2005-08-03 12:04 am (UTC)Okay, trust that it was a really long discussion :D
Re: At Long, Long Last! :D
Date: 2005-08-03 01:08 pm (UTC)Re: At Long, Long Last! :D
Date: 2005-08-04 02:30 am (UTC)Yes, you may edit your entry if, you'd like. You may include the questions on one or both, whichever you prefer.
Once you are ready, I will make an announcement to the group to let them know. If you want me to include any particulars in the email (summaries, questions for readers, etc.) to entice people to participate then I gladly will!
I will moderate the discussion and see that your questions are answered. Those who wish to post comments in the journal may do so or may do so on-list, unless you have specific preferences.
(I want this to be tooled to the preferences of the group and the writer, can you tell? :D)
Sorry for the delayed response. The dummies at my workplace ran over our Internet cable with a lawnmower today and shredded it to pieces.... >:(
Re: At Long, Long Last! :D
Date: 2005-08-04 09:59 am (UTC)Anyway, please don't kill me *ducks*. Because I have to work today again (Thurs.) I won't be able to get online and do anything until tonight probably. So last night I went ahead and posted my questions, etc. to the LJ for SWG but it's a separate posting for Aug. 3. I'm really confused about how to edit SWG entries. I can get into my own, but the SWG ones I can't figure out. I think I need to sit down and go through the FAQs thoroughly so I can learn how to do everything that everyone else seems to be able to do with no problem. I was going to ask you if I or you should make an announcement to the group, so I guess you can go ahead, unless you want me to do anything else beforehand. BTW, you probably already know about this, but did you realize that Tolkien had an early name for Maedhros that gave him the same name as you? (See my LJ entry for today. I came across it in my research.)
no subject
Date: 2005-08-04 05:50 pm (UTC)Yes, they really did! I guess they don't realize that running a writer's workshop and trying to author a novel is very hard work and requires *all* of my resources! ;P
I'm really confused about how to edit SWG entries.
I was curious about this, so I tried it on my most recent entry, and it let me in without a problem.
When you are on the Comments screen, there are five wee buttons at the top: green arrows at the right and left, a red heart, a blue pencil, and one that says "Tags." If you click on the blue pencil, it should allow you to edit the entry.
Is that how you've been doing it?
I know there is a back-door route to click on "Manage" and then "Entries," but this is too tedious and circuitous for me. (In other words, I am lazy.)
If you have trouble getting to the comments screen, click on "Read Comments" and the blue pencil should be available to you. Of course, you must be logged in for this to work.
I think I need to sit down and go through the FAQs thoroughly so I can learn how to do everything that everyone else seems to be able to do with no problem.
I came to LJ in March (I think), and I am still learning! One thing is true of technology: Just when you have everything figured out, they change it to make it "better." In the meantime, I post all of the links to the list. I believe that they are all consecutive postings and so should make for easy navigation.
no subject
Date: 2005-08-04 05:51 pm (UTC)(And I'm the moderator! Eek!)
EDITING ENTRIES IN SWG
Date: 2005-08-04 09:20 pm (UTC)Re: EDITING ENTRIES IN SWG
Date: 2005-08-05 12:36 pm (UTC)It might be easier to collect the three entries into one. You *should* be able to copy the original entry and paste it into a new entry, repeating this for each entry. (You'll have to work out of two browser windows to do this.) Or, you can copy and paste them into a Word document, then copy the whole thing and paste it into a new entry. This is assuming, of course, that you can get it to copy and paste from Word. (Which I still don't understand why that should not work! Argh!)
If this is too much of a pain in the behind, you may leave them as three separate entries, and I will send three separate links and navigation instructions :)
Anyway, let me know because I'm going to post to the list today about the workshop and I want to make sure everyone has the correct link.